Mom... Dad's Gone

"Where's Bob?"

“What do you mean he’s gone, he was just here.” This was the question posed by Jim’s mom to him as she frantically looked for her husband one morning at 2 AM. Bob had died 4 years earlier.

Jim, who helped form The CareGiver Partnership made one of the biggest life changing decisions seven years ago. He noticed his parents were declining and in need of help so he relocated his wife and 6 children from Houston back home to Tennessee where he grew up. His parents, Robert (82) and Dorothy (81) were still living in the house they built in 1964.

Jim moved within several miles of his parent’s home. In between taking care of running his own business and raising six children, he helped his parents with many of their needs including Doctor’s appointments, shopping, financial matters, and more complex things like developing trusts and a new investment strategy. Eventually Bob and Dolly moved to an assisted living complex, and continued their active lifestyle.

In late 2004, his father’s health began to decline while his mother began showing signs of dementia. His father, who was in and out of the hospital, passed away from congestive heart failure in 2005. Dorothy continued to live in the assisted living arrangement, but without Bob’s sound judgment it became difficult for her to continue to be actively involved in day to day decisions. Her dementia was mild some days and more severe others.

With Bob gone, Dorothy’s condition made it impossible for her to safely drive. Breaking this difficult news to her was actually aided in part by her dementia. She literally forgot about her car after a period of time.

It has now been 6 years in assisted living for Dorothy, but Jim cautions others to be prepared for what assisted living really means. While there is assistance with daily activities it is very important to have an advocate for a loved one. He serves as that, insuring Dorothy is getting the care she pays for, nearly $5000 per month and going up at least 7% every year, often with no justification. He continues to take her shopping, to doctor’s appointments, pays the bills, and visits frequently with his children. “Whenever I feel the least bit tired or frustrated with helping Mom, I keep in mind she was never too tired to do anything for me as a kid. I also hope that my children will see through my caregiving that this is a responsibility they will one day have and undertake it with joy.”

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About The CareGiver Partnership. Lynn Wilson founded The CareGiver Partnership based on her experience in caring for loved ones as well as providing the highest level of customer service. She takes pride in offering personalized attention service that helps her customers find solutions. Now that her children are grown, Lynn enjoys spending time with her granddaughter while also helping to care for her mom. To find out how The CareGiver Partnership can serve you, call 1-800-985-1353 M-F 9-4 CDT.

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