What to do when your incontinent *fill in the blank* (mom, dad, loved one, etc.) refuses to wear adult diapers

A few suggestions for how to get your loved one
to help manage their incontinence symptoms. 

If your loved one who is incontinent refuses to wear adult diapers, what can you do? Incontinence is a common medical condition, but that does not make it easy to accept when you are the one who has bladder control issues or bowel control problems. The following are a few suggestions for how to get your incontinent loved one to wear an absorbent product to help manage their symptoms.

First, let the doctor introduce the subject-Whether your are the caregiver, the son, the daughter, or a friend, if you have a loved one who is incontinent, don’t be the bearer of bad news. Let the doctor be the one to talk to them about it initially. It offers some authority, and does not come across as opinion, but as fact. When the doctor introduces the subject, ask that they address treatment options and cures. 

Second, be empathetic but not hesitant-
It can be embarrassing for an adult to have incontinence, but it is important to discuss it despite privacy and dignity. Admit your discomfort, but let them know you aren’t backing down. Avoidance and denial will not solve anything. Show compassion for how challenging it will be for them. Help them know that you understand how it is embarrassing for them. Being empathetic is critical, but you cannot hesitate. There will be far more embarrassment, and other potential problems if the incontinent individual does not use absorbent products.

Third, talk about how common it is-Normalize it. For many, refusal to wear adult diapers comes from pride, but it can also be a result of the unknown and scary. More than 25 million adult Americans suffer from some degree of incontinence. Help your loved one understand that this is a common medical condition, and one they can seek treatment for. Try to avoid using the words diaper or adult diaper when talking about absorbent products. Instead, call them disposable panties or disposable underpants. 

Fourth, be matter of fact about advantages of wearing absorbent products-Absorbent products offer incontinent individuals many advantages, including healthier skin, less embarrassment, protection, odor control, and more. They can even help protect furniture. 

Fifth, show them their options-

Help break through the misconceptions, and let your loved one know that they have options besides diapers. There are pads, guards, shields, briefs, boxers, belted, pull on, and more. Each designed for different levels of incontinence, some offering extreme discretion, like Prevail Boxers for Men, and others offering superior absorbency, like Tranquility. Try sample products. Call 800-985-1353 M-F 9-4 CST to talk to one of our product specialists. This is an all-female team who have each been a caregiver to a loved one. Since this is their only business, they know incontinence products inside and out, and want to help you.

If your loved one still refuses to try, just leave some in his or her underwear drawer and drop the matter for a while. People are often torn between wanting a solution to their problem and getting over their own pride or misconceptions about absorbent undergarments.

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About The CareGiver Partnership. The CareGiver Partnership helps caregivers and their loved ones with answers to their caregiving questions, including information about home health care products and supplies, from our Wisconsin-based team of Product Specialists who are all current or former caregivers. The company’s Web site provides the largest online library of resources on subjects most important to caregivers — from arthritis to assisted living, and Parkinson’s to prostate cancer — as well as access to more than 3,000 home care products for incontinence, skin care, mobility, home safety and daily living aids. The CareGiver Partnership was founded in 2004 by Lynn Wilson of Neenah, Wisc. Visithttp://www.caregiverpartnership.com to learn more or call 1-800-985-1353.